“Sometimes I can feel my bones straining under the weight of all the lives I’m not living.”
Jonathan Safran Foer, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close

This quote has always resonated deep within my soul because I have this zest for life and I want to do it all. I want to experience everything. I want to go rock climbing, scuba diving and learn how to fence (as in the art of sword fighting) and learn martial arts. I want to master every aspect of homesteading and self-sustainability – aqua/hydroponics, wallipini greenhouses, wild foraging, gardening, all the food preservation methods out there and more. I want to read all the books, practice mounted archery and swim with dolphins. I want to draw and paint the thousands of ideas I have and write all the stories in my head.

I want to be a good mother and wife and teach my kids to be good, Christian people. I want to home school my children and give them every tool they’ll need in life. I want to be a good steward to what God has blessed me with. I want to be a good Christian. I want to be organized and keep a clean house. I want to be a good cook and always have fresh, healthy, home cooked meals for my family. I want to be a good friend who remembers birthdays and anniversaries. I want to ride my horses in beautiful places. I want to wander in the woods and explore. I want to rehabilitate wildlife and get a job at a zoo – and a vet clinic. I want to learn…everything!

“You do what you can for as long as you can, and when you finally can’t, you do the next best thing. You back up, but you don’t give up.”
Chuck Yeager

So how do I do it all? The answer is – I don’t. I probably won’t ever practice martial arts or become the next Merida, shooting arrows at targets from the back of a galloping horse. But you know what? I am right where I am supposed to be. Right where God wants me. With my children and doing what I can for as long as I can. Is the house always clean and organized? Definitely not. Do we eat home cooked meals three times a day? Absolutely not. Do I remember everyone’s birthdays and anniversaries? No, I do not. But you know what? When my kids are asked who loves them, their answer is always “God and momma and daddy” and so, I think I am doing all that matters.