“Comparison is the thief of joy.”

-Theodore Roosevelt

Have you ever gotten ahead of yourself because rather than following your own path, you are comparing yourself to others and worrying about missing opportunities? Well, that’s me. You may have seen this coming with my post Finding Your Rhythm: Making Time for What Truly Matters back in November. I started this blog because it is something I am passionate about but I got stuck in a rut thinking I HAVE to write a certain number of times a week, no matter what, because ALGORITHMS. I HAVE to write about topics that will bring about the most ENGAGEMENT. I HAVE to try to keep up with all of these “professional” influencers. I HAVE to keep my readers active and grow my subscribers list and keep my insights in the green and…. But wait, this is not a paid job that I HAVE to do. This should not be a source of stress in my already very busy and often stressful life. This is supposed to be a meaningful journey of passion and building community.

You may have noticed that my posts have come a bit less often recently. I am not giving up my blog but I AM going to take time to do more beyond the blog. I typically have two days a week that my mom spends time with my twins, which gives me some (somewhat uninterrupted) time to work on projects. I inadvertently slipped into the mindset that I HAD to use those two days a week writing for my blog and all of my other projects took a back burner. But, when I do that, my stress level rises and my joy level goes down in a (predictably) “perfect” inverse relationship.

So, (up until my post yesterday), I took a little hiatus from writing to get back to the things that give me joy, and also, incidentally, give me my passion and subjects to write about!

I have used my more recent “free time” to play and read more books with my kids, try new recipes, and make more foods from scratch for my family. I have spent some time working on illustrations for my new children’s book, crocheting a new winter shawl, and working on homemade Christmas gifts for friends and family. I have played with my sourdough boules, experimenting with new scoring designs just for fun – hello Christmas trees! I spent time with family rather than finding a quiet corner to write, deep cleaned the house, including the turtle tank (you’re welcome, Michelangelo), and organized the house (thank you, Laura, for your help with my appalling pantry). I took an entire day one week to catch up with an old friend with no timeline or rush to get back to anything and I am still feeling a warm happiness from that visit, although it took place over 2 weeks ago. I have even picked up ACTUAL, PHYSICAL books and read (not research, just beautiful windows into fantastical worlds for my own enjoyment). I had gone such a long stretch of only listening to audiobooks while I work on other things that actually reading and ONLY reading just for me felt luxurious and self-indulgent. I am determined to make sure that happens regularly from now on, because: self-care.

These are the things that give me joy and the things that I can write passionately about. So, as I come back to write to you, my writing will be guided by joy and authentic inspiration—not by the frantic hustle of the algorithm. My goal is to use my “free time” to live life and then write about it, rather than sacrificing life for the writing. I believe that a little less frequency, filled with a lot more passion, will make this space better for all of us.

Now, I’d love to hear from you: Have you ever had to step back from a passion project because it started feeling like a chore? What activity did you return to that helped refill your cup and bring the joy back? What is the most wonderfully “self-indulgent” thing you’ve done for yourself recently? Did you pick up an old hobby, read a book, spend quality time with a loved one, or finally organize that appalling pantry? Share your self-care wins in the comments below!